THE FOUR AGREEMENTS

These are definitely words to live by, I printed them up and look at them every day!  

 

THE FOUR AGREEMENTS

1.BE IMPECCABLE WITH YOUR WORD:
Speak with integrity.  Say what you mean.
Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others.  Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

    2.DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY
Nothing others do is because of you.  What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream.  When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you wont be the victim of needless suffering.

3.DON’T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want.  Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness, and drama.  With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

4.ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST
Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you, are healthy as opposed to sick.  Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse, and regret.

Excerpt from the book: “The Four Agreements”
 by: Don Miguel Ruiz

FRIENDS

Think about this for a minute.... If I happened to show up on your door step crying, would you care? If I called you and asked  you to pick me up because something happened, would you come? If I had one day left to live my life, would you be part of that last day?  If I needed a shoulder to cry on, would you give me yours? This is a test to see who your real friends are or if you are just someone to talk to you  when they are bored. Do you know what the relationship is between your two eyes? They blink together,  they move together, they cry together,  they see things together,  and they sleep together,  but they never see each other; ....that's what friendship is..  Your aspiration is your motivation, your  motivation is your belief,  your belief is your peace,  your peace is your target,  your target is heaven,  and life is like hard core torture without it! It's 'World Best Friends Week' Who is your best friend? Send this to all your good friends, even me,  if I am one of them. See how many you get back. If you get more than 3  then you really are  a lovable person... Save the Earth... it's the only planet with chocolate!!!!

EXCERPT'S FROM THE RED DIARY

Dated: January 18th 2009:

I'm at this place in life that is far darker than anywhere I've ever been before.  On the one hand; I feel this all encompassing, heavy blackness, of which I have no power over.  On the other hand; is an almost electric sense of fear coarsing throughout my body. 

The reason I added this last entry was to show the change in me over the past year +.

Monday March 1, 2010 10:00 a.m.

Hello Sweetheart!

Today makes the 8th day I've been living in this Foster Home in Junction City.  I haven't seen you since January 8th-2 whole months!  I miss you so much it hurts!

Especially, not hearing a word from you or about you.  You're never on the family site, which was set up for you by the way.  You don't call, ever!

Do you ever think of me?  Are you mad at me for giving up the apartment?

If you only knew how much less stress I feel away from there, you wouldn't be angry with me.  Even though Jake and Ashley helped me so very much, having them there pushed my stress & anxiety levels beyond my limits.

Rossi said a little hello to me on the site a week ago, but nothing about you!

This place is very nice and I already feel at home.  I'm surrounded by God's beauty and I love that!

Wednesday March 24, 2010

Hello Sweetheart!

You wouldn't believe the change in me!  Due to having to go outside and smoke, I'm actually tan for the first time in 9 years!  And I smoke much less.  I feel much better emotionally too.  Knowing that you're working hard to support yourself makes me feel so proud!  I still wish I could hear from you more, though.

Now that I sold the T.V. and know that you'll be able to get a phone on the 1st helps alot!  I just hope you save enough minutes to talk to me once a week!

All of your life I knew it was a possibility that you might move away when you grew up, but, honestly, I just didn't think you would!  I always saw our relationship as closer than most Mother's and Son's.  I realize your need for "Adventure" and finding your own way in life; I did it too!  I just hope and pray that when you're ready to settle down, you'll do it closer to home!

I Love You more than Anything and Everything!

Mom

Monday May 17th, 2010 1:30 p.m.

Hi Vin!

When I read back in this Diary, I feel ashamed.  I really put you through a lot in the past 8 years.  Between my physical ailments and my Bi-Polar Depression, you've really been through a lot of up's & down's with me!

I want to take this time to apologize:  I am Truly Sorry!!!

I pray you'll be able to forgive me and allow our relationship to move forward from this point on.....

I really wish all these positive changes that have taken place in me over the past few months, could have happened years ago!  But, I'm working on only looking forward now.  I have so much to live for and look forward to, that's my focus now!

I so look forward to your finding the perfect Woman for you and your Wedding, if you so chose to go that route.  I can't hardly wait to become a Grandmother!  I'm going to think positively and believe that someday you'll return home, to this area, so we can be close in a whole new and wonderful way!

I've recently taken up Photography, (purely amateur stuff,lol)  It gives me a Peace I've never had before!  I can't wait to take tons of pictures of you and your future family!

God Bless you, Son!

Please know that I'm always with you in spirit!

All my Love,

Always!!!

Mom

Relationships

Excerpt from the "Red Diary", dated: July 16, 2008 + additional observations dated: today!

RELATIONSHIPS:

It never ceases to amaze me how rarely people tell their loved ones; "I love you"! and hug each other!  Something has happened in families to pull them apart.  It's like a lot of strangers sharing the same home.
When Donovan and I were still together and we were still in California, about 10-12 years ago, I called a family meeting because, although we were all very good at hugging & professing our love, earlier that day you & your dad went to the store without saying 'goodbye'.
So, in this meeting, we all agreed that each and every time we left the house no matter for how long, we swore to always give a hug and say, "I love you"!
If anything were to happen while we're away from each other, at least we'd always know the last words spoken were: "I Love You"!
Donovan is long gone from our lives, but you and I had continued this promise to each other.  I think it's a very important tradition and pray you keep it always in your life!
I, personally, never get tired of saying or hearing it! BTW:
I LOVE YOU, BUBBA!!!

I found the following when searching for pix about relationships, they are most definetly words to live by!

 And another "Pic" I found:

 

DO'S AND DON'TS ON THE JOB

1st- Do Always work hard and do your best at everything. If you see someone working harder, work twice as hard as they  are! Without insulting them, of course, or trying to make a contest about it.
 
2nd-Do your absolute best at not burning bridges! If you work harder and better than even you thought you could do and always show respect to your boss, (like it or not) (like him or not). That way you can always count on getting a good reference, which is way more important than I ever thought. Try to leave a job in a good light, with plenty of notice so you can get a letter of recommendation before you leave. Even in your current situation, whether being paid under the table or not, that recommendation can really come in handy!!
 
3rd-DO Make work fun! Smile a lot! Hum while you work! This may sound silly and sometimes you have to force it, but it makes a huge difference not only in your day, but in that of the people around you, also!  The more you hate what you’re doing, the more you should hum, smile and only allow good thoughts into your head!  Don’t allow the negatives to enter your mind! Just try it, it really works!

4th- Don’t forget to thank your boss and co-workers whenever you can. MANNERS MATTER!!!!   For instance:  Show your boss how appreciative you are for the job. This is VERY IMPORTANT, Bubba!  If he doesn’t think you appreciate it, it wont be pleasant to work for him and it wont last!

5th- If you don’t know how to do something, never be afraid to ask.  I know you’ve never cared what people think of you, but sometimes it matters what they think. In this case, don’t worry about how you look by asking, what to you might seem like a dumb question, because you’ll really look dumb doing it wrong! 

 I think about you and what I can do to help you all the time, so I hope you don’t mind if I write you again and again with ideas as they come to me!
I love you more than anything on this earth, Vin’! You’re my light, my heart and soul!!!!!! Please, always take care of yourself and remember always, God and I have your back!!!

With Blessings and Love;
Mom

Desiderata

Rose shared this with me and I wanted to share it with you, it's very inspirational!

  

-- written by Max Ehrmann in the 1920s --
Latin for: Things to be Desired

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible, without surrender,
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even to the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
they are vexatious to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain or bitter,
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs,
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals,
and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love,
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be.
And whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life,
keep peace in your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

The Confused History of "Desiderata"

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Insights...
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The Four Agreements

My dear son, Vincent:  As you know I've been writing Diaries to you since the day I found out I was expecting you, over 21 years ago now.  I thought it might be nice to put down all those things I wrote down and other thoughts and information that may help you in your life journey. I've had a very adventurous life, not in the way most people think of adventure.  I've traveled within the country a little, but mostly it's just my experiences I consider adventures.  Life is an adventure, and some have more than others!  I'm going to start with an excerpt from a book by: Don Miguel Ruiz, my Counselor gave this to me and I am hooked, these are definitely words to live by:

THE FOUR AGREEMENTS

BE IMPECCABLE WITH YOUR WORD

~Speak with integrity.  Say only what you mean.

~Avoid using the word to speak against yourself 

or to gossip about others.  Use the power of your

word in the direction of truth and love.

DON'T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY 

~Nothing others do is because of you.  What

others say and do is a projection of their own

reality, their own dream.  When you are immune

to the opinions and actions of others, you wont

be the victim of needless suffering.

DON'T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS 

~Find the courage to ask questions and to express

what you really want.  

~Communicate with others as clearly as you can

to avoid misunderstandings, sadness, and drama.

With just this one agreement, you can completely

transform your life.

ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST 

~Your best is going to change from moment to

moment;  it will be different when you are healthy

as opposed to sick.  Under any circumstance,

simply do your best, and you will avoid self-

judgment, self-abuse, and regret. 

What I find exceptionally ironic about this, and I'm sure you heard it too:

Some of those things, I've said to you and some you've said to me!  You've always

been such an intelligent and wise young man and you've taught me alot.  I just pray I've taught you some too!

I will attempt to help you along your individual road, honey and pray some of it will be helpful to you on that journey! 

All my Love Forever,

Mom

To be continued.....